Self-Care for the Mind, Body, and Soul
Every month I decide that I’m going to practice more self-care. I’m going to do a face mask once a week and watch a movie; I’ll light candles and put on a mellow playlist and have a spa day. I haven’t done any of these things, and actually I’ve never been to a spa so I don’t really know what I’d be trying to emulate. I don’t have the dedication to sit through an entire movie - it just makes me feel restless, and I end up feeling guilty for not having done something “productive,” as if taking care of myself is a “lesser than” task. I’m working on shifting that mindset and finding a better balance, but right now, this isn’t the kind of self-care that works for me.
Self-care doesn’t have to be an aesthetic bubble bath with flower petals and mood lighting or a box of chocolate and a movie marathon. It absolutely can be, and it’s important to give yourself that if that’s what you’re feeling. But you don’t have to take part in these activities just because “everyone else is” or “that’s what looks the best.” Consider what act of kindness you can bestow upon yourself to put your mind at ease. Sometimes, it’s a hard workout at the gym to expel any negative energy you’ve been harboring. Sometimes, it’s setting boundaries within your own life. Other times, it really might be treating yourself to new clothes or turning your room into a spa. It goes without saying that there’s no right or wrong way to care for yourself, but you deserve to ease your mind and reset as often as you need.
Right now, self-care for me looks like getting a couple minutes of fresh air everyday. Over these past couple of months, I have spent weeks at a time cooped up indoors without even stepping outside or opening a window. I know how much better I feel in sunlight, fresh air, and nature in general, so I have been making it a priority to at least walk outside in my backyard for 5 minutes a day. It’s nothing major or glamorous, but it’s calming for my mind and body, which is really what I need.
Right now, self-care for me is planning out my week and revisiting that plan on a daily basis. It’s forgiving myself for not getting everything done on my to-do list because I know I overestimate my efficiency and underestimate the time I will take to get any given task done. It’s allowing myself to skip a workout and give my body a break when I’m just not up to it. It’s maintaining a fixed sleep schedule no matter how much I have to do, because I know that if I stay up too late, I’m going to feel drained the next day. None of these mean that I’m throwing discipline out the window either; rather, I’m setting boundaries for myself to avoid burning out and to ensure that I am treating myself with kindness.
Of course, none of this is fixed. I think it’s healthy to experiment with different acts of self-care and see what works for you. When my schedule shifts to make room for other habits I want to incorporate, I want to try to journal daily, clean and organize my room, and use face masks once a week.
Here’s a compilation of some self-care activities to help you take some time for yourself or relinquish something that has been holding you back or stressing you out.
This first category might be the more “obvious” acts we think of as self-care.
Put on your favorite playlist or TV show that brings you comfort.
Journal.
Dress up, wear your favorite outfit, or get ready. I’ve been spending most of my days in pajamas, and the longer I’m in them, the harder it is to ever want to change out of them. But those days that I do end up dressing up a little more or doing my hair, I feel a little extra boost in my mood. This can look different for each of us - maybe it’s painting our nails, putting on makeup or jewelry, or wearing jeans instead of sweatpants. Whatever it is, sometimes an external change can impact our internal mindset.
Light a candle or turn on a diffuser.
Call up a friend.
Get some fresh air.
Eat your favorite food.
Take a break! It’s okay to relax and take time for yourself. We aren’t machines that can work nonstop, and we shouldn’t treat ourselves that way either. Take a nap, eat a snack, walk around. Take a day or more off. Just give yourself time to reset and feel energized again.
Say some affirmations. Remind yourself of your worth, strength, and capabilities. Trust me, you have a lot of all of these. :)
Don’t forget the power of taking care of your internal state, too. The exercises below may be just what’s needed to face some of the harder aspects of our life we might be pushing off. Sometimes, the best way to take care of ourselves is to do the things we don’t want to face in the short run so that we can feel more at peace in the long run.
Take some time to write out everything on your mind and make a plan for the next day, week, or month. Having a plan helps put your tasks, stresses, and goals into perspective. Not only does breaking these up into smaller tasks seem less daunting, but it also gives you more flexibility to take on little tasks during any shorter time intervals or push them off to the next day without feeling as overwhelmed.
Tackle that task that has been a drag on your days. If you’ve been procrastinating something that’s been on the back of your mind and fueling your stress, set aside a little bit of time to either finish that task or at least chip away at it. Your future self will thank you for it, and you may even realize it wasn’t that big of a deal to start.
Forgive yourself. If you’ve been harboring guilt, shame, or some other negative feeling, especially if others were involved and have forgiven you, consider why you feel this way, what is missing in order for you to forgive yourself, and allow yourself to move forward. We all make mistakes, and it’s important that we give ourselves the chance to learn from our past and be better every day. If we don’t forgive ourselves, we deny ourselves the opportunity to grow and improve.
Let go of something that isn’t bringing you joy or positive energy. If something (or someone) has been weighing you down for an extended period of time, consider if you would feel freer without it. Can you remedy this situation? Is it worth your time to do so? Will it happen again? Remember that you probably reflect the energy you attract into your life, so reevaluate anything holding you back.
Take a break from social media and/or cleanse your social media. Are you following accounts that affect you negatively, cause you to question your self-worth, or just generally don’t sit well with you? Taking a break from your devices might be helpful, and unfollowing or unsubscribing can have more lasting positive effects. You can always refollow whenever you want! After all, we have enough pressures in our real day-to-day lives without the additional stressors from social media.
Send someone a nice message. This might not seem like self-care at first, but I think we can all agree that giving and receiving kindness always goes a long way in improving our days (just as a lack thereof can really ruin our day). I know how warm and happy I feel when someone says something nice to me. Even a stranger complimenting my shoes instantly makes me smile. I’m sure most of us appreciate moments of compassion from strangers and loved ones alike. Why not spread that love and positivity to others? Whether it’s someone you talk to on a regular basis or someone you haven’t spoken to in years, reach out and let them know you’re thinking of them.
Just sit and do nothing! I personally find this one hard to wrap my head around. As someone who is extremely restless and somehow self-imposes a never ending to-do list, I can’t fathom just sitting and doing nothing. Not working, not watching a video, not talking to a friend, eating, or doing a hobby??? I think this one can be especially hard when we are so used to the hustle and bustle of life, but that’s all the more reason it’s so important. Sometimes we just need to sit with our thoughts, reflect, and tune out of our surroundings so that we can shift our focus inward.
The last thing I want to leave you with is a reminder to practice any kind of self-care as often as possible. Turn self-care into a habit rather than an afterthought that you perform because you “probably should.” This doesn’t have to mean movie nights every night (though, of course, it can), but it could mean a rotating cycle of eating your favorite foods, planning, and journaling. I personally tend to think about self-care more often around Valentine’s Day when I see content about love and care pervading all forms of media. But I’m working on remembering that self-care isn’t a moment in time, but rather a means of nurturing ourselves so that we can, in turn, share that care with others.
Let me know your favorite self-care activities in the comments below or by emailing/DMing me. Is there anything new you want to start implementing? Share your thoughts and suggestions below so we can all get new ideas from one another!
P.S. If there’s anything I can do to make these posts or even the website more accessible, please leave your feedback below or email/DM me. Inclusivity is super important to me, so I’d love to make any adjustments to ensure this content can be accessed by all!